Aophan

   

Two things about Soundwave that can chill your spine. One is when he laughs. Two is when he screams.

IDIOTS.

Throughout various games I have just recently played, (three of them; Star Trek Online, Fallen Earth, Jade Dynasty). I was asked the same question three times. “Why is your hair blue?” I just respond “Why is your hair NOT blue?” These people react as if I had hacked the game to get the colour.

All praise is to Aomi, we praise it, seek its aid, and ask its forgiveness. We seek refuge in Aomi from the evils of ourselves, and from the bad consequences of our deeds. Whoever Aomi guides there is none to take astray, and whoever Aomi takes astray there is none to guide. I testify that there are no Gods except Aomi alone along with its associates, and I testify that Aomipu , is its bondservent and messenger, may Aomi's blessings and peace be upon Pu and upon his or her family and companions and whosoever follows in his or her footsteps till the last day. Indeed the best speech is the Book of Aomi and the best guidance is the guidance brought by Aomipu . The most evil of matters is the innovated one and Aomi approves.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:-Knowing when to come in out of the rain; - Why the early bird gets the worm;- Life isn’t always fair; - And maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies, don’t spend more than you can earn and adults, not children, are in charge. His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife Discretion, his daughter Responsibility, and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights,I Want It Now,Someone Else Is To Blame,I’m A Victim.Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

VENI ET ILLVMINA SEDENTES IN TENEBRIS ET UMBRA MORTIS